I recently started watching I Can Hear Your Voice that was released in 2013 and it made me think about the genre of ‘Noona romance’ in Kdramas. Noona means elder sister (unnie is older sister to a younger sister and noona is older sister to a younger brother) and specifically in a noona romance, the female lead is older than the guy. The first Kdrama that I watched with an older female lead was When the Camellia Blooms and and the empathetic handling of a single mother’s romance took me by surprise. Since my first watch I have seen several other noona romance dramas and given that Kdramas have a high proportion of female screenwriters, it is not surprising that the Kdrama world is replete with beautiful and sensitive love stories between an older female and a younger guy.
The opposition to the relationship in a noona romance usually comes from a mix of society, friends and immediate family, but in my observation, the conflict prominently arises within the female lead. The female protagonist is depicted as being torn between her love for the man and the age gap thats exists. I find the female’s moral entanglement interesting since it is not something you see when an older man is romancing a younger female. For instance, in all honesty, I initially had a hard time watching THE famous Kdrama Goblin because I could not wrap my head around the age gap. Granted it is a mythical drama and the two leads do not get intimate until the female protagonist is an adult and working, but you do not see the same tussle that a man might go through as opposed to a female in a similar situation. In contrast to the female’s dilemma, the male lead is shown as confident and decisive about his affections for the female lead. In the Kdrama A Witch’s Romance, the female lead on learning that the age gap between her and the hunk she was about to have a one night stand with is 15 years, stops herself, but the male lead played by Park Seo-Joon is baffled as to how does the age gap matter if there is consent and attraction.
The male protagonists are also dogged in their pursuit of the female, but not to the extent of disrespecting the female’s personal ambitions and struggles over a relationship with a huge age gap. I found it humorous that in the Kdrama Search WWW, Im Soo-Jong’s character does not take her one night stand as seriously as the guy did (played by Jang Ki-Yong). Her male counterpart had to work hard to make her believe in his sincerity. Or recently in Hometown Cha Cha Cha, Gong Min‑Jeung (the actress who plays Shin Min-A’s best friend) is the older one and takes the lead in her relationship with the police officer.
I do have a bias when it comes to When the Camellia Blooms because I absolutely loved the way in which the concerns of a single mother were brought to the fore and the manner in which the male lead handled and understood those concerns. Kang Ha-Neul’s (who in my opinion does not get as many Kdramas as he should!! what a brilliant actor) sincere love leaped out of the drama to the viewer and I adored his interactions with the son of the woman he loved. A Witch’s Romance is surprisingly mature and I enjoyed the drama a lot and Romance is a Bonus Book is also endearing. I did find the Kdrama High School King of Savvy starring Seo In-Guk uncomfortable to watch since the male lead is a high school student. A romance between a high school student and an office worker did not really sit well with me.
Romantic relationships with an age gap can be tricky since power dynamics come into play and can hence be exploitative, particularly when the older one is a man, which brings me to an important point regarding noona romance in Kdramas. Although I like the gender reversal and the delicate treatment in the narrative, the Kdramas simultaneously shatter and sustain gender stereotypes. Noona romances shatter the conventional heterosexual romance by featuring older, professionally successful women and younger men who need to work hard for their affections. However, the kdramas also uphold the notion of confident, protective and sometimes entitled men.
For instance in I Can Hear Your Voice, Lee Jong-Suk’s character promises to always protect the female lead and also learns Taekwondo. In When the Camellia Blooms quite conveniently Ha-Neul is a police officer, whereas in Romance is a Bonus Book starring Jong-Suk again, he is always looking out for Lee Na-Young despite her getting married. And how can I forget Jung Hae-In’s protective and aggressive stance against Yoon Se-Jin’s abusive ex boyfriend in Something in the Rain. It is as if the other ‘masculine’ qualities are exaggerated to an extent to compensate for the men’s younger age.
Films or shows where the romantic lead have a big age gap is not uncommon, but usually it is more common to see an older male than an older female. Since Anglophone or Euro-centric media tropes are the dominant ones, the gender reversal in noona romance is refreshing. Even within our society, nobody bats an eyelid if an older male dates or marries a younger female, but woe unto the woman who decides to date a younger man. Priyanka Chopra Jones’ marriage to Nick Jones ruffled many feathers and led to social media trolling as well, which is why noona romances are like a breath of fresh air and go a long way in normalising age gap between a woman and man.
Most Korean romance dramas have rules. In the past, Cinderella stories were popular. Recently, the story of 연상연하커플 (the woman is the older of the couple) is the trend ;-)